Learning to Handle Peer Pressure When it Comes to Sex

Sex seems to be everywhere – in films and TV, on the pages of your favourite magazine, in the lyrics of your most-loved songs. Then there’s the peer pressure from your friends, from your boyfriend or your girlfriend, not just to talk about sex but to actually do it. It can seem almost impossible to resist that pressure but learning your own mind and making your own decisions about your body and emotional wellbeing is an essential part of growing up.

Sometimes your teenage years can feel like an emotional rollercoaster of hormonal, physical and emotional physical changes. All of them are tied to the subject of sex, the topic of obsession among you and your friends. While you’re all talking about it, remember that not everyone – despite what they claim – is actually doing it. The age of consent in the UK is 16 and the reality is that is the age at which most of us will have sex for the first time. Like a lot of playground claims, many friends’ stories of their sexual exploits are likely to be untrue or, at best, exaggerated wildly.

You need to move at your own pace towards having sex for the first time. A sure-fire way to regret your behaviour is to rush into physical intimacy when you’re not ready for it, just because you feel that’s what everyone is expecting of you.

You need to trust your boyfriend or girlfriend before you can even consider taking such a huge step with them so take your time in getting to know him or her properly. This is the point at which much of the pressure kicks in.

That pressure might come from your partner who may be pushing you to go further than you want. It can come in the form of subtle hints that everyone is doing it, so why don’t you? Or in emotional blackmail, such as “if you love me, you’ll sleep with me”. Peer pressure comes from friends who might be boasting about their sexual exploits and making fun of you for still being a virgin.

No matter what anyone says, the only person who has the right to decide when you have sex is you. Even if you think you’re in love with your partner, having sex with them won’t prove how much you care. Your partner should respect your decision, whatever you say, and if they don’t, you should consider whether you are right for each other.

Making the decision that’s best for you when it comes to sex could have implications for your whole life. You don’t want to look back with regrets on what should be one of the most memorable experiences you can have.

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