Planning ahead is greatly underused as a way of making your sex life more pleasurable – if you live with chronic pain, spontaneous sex will never be easy to achieve. Although it may not be the sexier option, planning and preparing could be one way of injecting a little more satisfaction into your sexual experience. Generally, you will notice that you experience pain more at certain times of the day, so working around this could help your muscles be less painful and your joints less stiff.
If you take medication to ease the pain of your condition, you could try timing sex for when the therapeutic nature of the treatment is at its most potent. Try different positions to see which ones cause less pain for you, which can help make sex more enjoyable, and try doing gentle stretches before which may make it easier to move in bed.
Don’t belittle the importance of simply touching and being touched, which not only feels great but it also increases intimacy between you and your partner – massaging, cuddling and kissing are all great activities you can enjoy which won’t cause you as much pain as sex. Also, make sure you communicate with your partner about how much pain you’re feeling during sex, your favourite positions and what you’d like more of during sex. These conversations may be a little awkward at times, but they’re important in creating a more open and enjoyable sex life in your relationship.