While there are countless of articles dedicated to female sexual health, with particular regard to making sure you’re informed and emotionally ready for sex, there’s less attention paid to how the first time affects men’s sexual wellness, and mental wellbeing. However, there’s a good chance that, as a young man, your first inkling of sex is from porn or movies where everything goes perfectly, and, sadly, real life is not like that. So what can you do the get the most out of your first time?
Firstly, you should NEVER forget the condoms. Even if you don’t think sex is a possibility, you should always have a condom on you just in case. The heat of the moment can cloud your judgement, which leads to unprotected sex and, potentially, unwanted pregnancies or STDs. Another thing to remember before you get down to it is to communicate with your partner. Not discussing sex is one of the most common problems new couples have in the bedroom, but the whole experience will be better if you talk to your partner about any inhibitions or fears that you or they have about intercourse. Ask them about what works for them and their expectations, and be honest about your own. You may be anxious that your partner expects mind-blowing sex out of you right off the bat, but talking can alleviate those concerns.
Next, try to take your time and enjoy the moment. This isn’t a test of your manhood or a game; it’s a close moment with your partner that you will cherish in times to come. Remember that there’s far more to sex than just penetrative sex – and other aspects can be more pleasurable to your woman than intercourse. You can have an amazing night with kissing, foreplay, oral sex, mutual masturbation, necking, dry humping, rubbing, massages, mammary intercourse and much more, so don’t rush to the end goal of penetration.
Also, it’s not uncommon to experience premature ejaculation or erection issues. Premature ejaculation is fairly common because of the way sex feels for the very first time, and you may have trouble having an erection because of the psychological pressures of it being your first time, but that doesn’t mean your night is over. You can still please your partner using the kinds of foreplay listed above. The important thing to remember is that NO ONE is good the first time. It takes a lot of time and experience – just like everything else – but just think of all the fun you can have practising through safe sex!