On The Go: Do You Wear A Don’t-bother-me Face?

You’re on the bus, and one of the only free seats is next to you. How, and why, do you stop another passenger sitting there? Research reveals the tactics commuters use to avoid each other. This practice, says the study published in the journal ‘Symbolic Interaction’, is a don’t-bother-me face with a hostile stare or a deliberate and intensely focused phone check. The study has been carried out by researcher Esther Kim, from Yale University, who chalked up thousands of miles of bus travel to examine the unspoken rules and behaviours of commuters.

“We live in a world of strangers, where life in public spaces feels increasingly anonymous,” says Kim. “However, avoiding other people actually requires quite a lot of effort and this is especially true in confined spaces like public transport.”

We seem to engage in all sorts of behaviour to avoid others, pretending to be busy, checking phones, rummaging through bags, looking past people or falling asleep. “Sometimes,” says Kim, “we even don a ‘don’t-bother-me face’ or what’s known as the ‘hate stare’.”

Kim found that the greatest unspoken rule of bus travel is that if other seats are available you shouldn’t sit next to someone else. As the passengers claimed, “It makes you look weird.” When all the rows are filled and more passengers are getting aboard the seated passengers initiate a performance to strategically avoid anyone sitting next to them.

“I became what’s known as an experienced traveller and I jotted down many of the different methods people use to avoid sitting next to someone else,” says Kim.

The best advice from Kim’s fellow passengers is:

  • Avoid eye contact with other people
  • Lean against the window and stretch out your legs
  • Place a large bag on the empty seat
  • Sit on the aisle seat and turn on your iPod so you can pretend you can’t hear people asking for the window seat
  • Place several items on the spare seat so it’s not worth the passenger’s time waiting for you to move them
  • Look out the window with a blank stare to look crazy
  • Pretend to be asleep
  • Put your coat on the seat to make it appear already taken

• If all else fails, lie and say the seat has been taken by someone else.

However, all this changes when it is announced that the bus will be full so all seats should be made available. The objective changes, from sitting alone to sitting next to a ‘normal’ person. Kim has found that race, class, gender and other background characteristics were not key concerns for commuters when they discovered someone had to sit next them. They all just wanted to avoid the ‘crazy person’.

“One rider told me the objective is just ‘getting through the ride’, and that I should avoid fat people who may sweat more and so may be more likely to smell,” says Kim. “Motivating this nonsocial behaviour is the fact that one’s own comfort level is the rider’s key concern, rather than the backgrounds of fellow passengers.”

What could be the reason for this non-social behaviour? Kim has found that this behaviour is also driven by safety concerns, especially for coach travel, which is perceived to be dangerous with ill-lit bus stations. Passengers also expect each other to be jaded by delays or other inconveniences. “In a cafe, which is more relaxed, people often ask strangers to watch their stuff for a moment,” says Kim. “Yet at bus stations that rarely happens as people assume their fellow passengers will be tired and stressed out.”

“Ultimately, this nonsocial behaviour is due to the many frustrations of sharing a small public space together for a lengthy amount of time,” concludes Kim. “Yet this deliberate disengagement is a calculated social action, which is part of a wider culture of social isolation in public spaces.”

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