Through books, movies and word of mouth, we are conditioned to believe that for a sexual experience to be fulfilling, it has to last a long time. This idea can actually be damaging to your wellbeing and wellness, through self-esteem, as you feel that if your sex sessions aren’t lasting for hours then something is missing from your relationship. Men can also feel huge pressure to make sure that things don’t end too quickly, when in reality they should be allowed to ‘let go’ some time.
All over the media, the idea that everyone wants sex to last all night is perpetuated, and yet this is actually contrary to research, which indicates that over 40 percent of women have faked an orgasm in the past, purely to ‘get it over with’. The best sex is really not the sex that goes on for as long as possible, and it in no way reflects the ultimate expression of sexual intimacy or lovemaking.
Men fear that their masculinity will be measured against how long they can last in bed. They feel that if they can keep going for ages it will prove his sexual prowess and satisfy his partner.
In reality, it doesn’t matter how long sex lasts, really, it’s all about quality and not quantity. If men are not doing the right things in the right places then it doesn’t matter how long it lasts, it will be uncomfortable or just plain boring for their partner. Intercourse is only pleasurable for a woman if she has adequate clitoral stimulation, and if this does not happen then it does not matter how long the act goes on for, it will still not be a pleasurable experience for her.
Most of the nerve endings are actually on the outer area of the vagina, not the inner area, so the idea that prolonged penetrative sex is more pleasurable is completely misleading.