Finding out that your partner has had an affair is never easy. And while many people would make the decision to leave a cheating partner, infidelity doesn’t necessarily have to mean the end of your relationship. If you’ve decided to try and rebuild your relationship after an affair, it will take time and effort from both parties.
In the early days you might not be feeling very forgiving but if you want to move on, you need to make the decision to forgive your partner. The first step is to understand why your partner was unfaithful. Are they feeling bored with your relationship, do they feel neglected or unloved, or are they trying to recreate the excitement of their youth? While there is never an excuse for infidelity, understanding why your partner was unfaithful can help you both make changes in your relationship to create a stronger bond for the future.
If you’ve taken the decision to stick with your partner, it’s important to put the affair in the past. Don’t use it as a weapon in future arguments and avoid asking questions about the affair – knowing all the gory details rarely helps.
The single most beneficial thing you can do to speed up the healing process is to spend quality time together. Remember the things you used to enjoy when you first got together and try find the time to enjoy doing similar things again. Whether it’s taking a walk in the park, meeting for lunch, or visiting the cinema; spending time together is an important step in rebuilding your relationship.
To find out about relationship counselling, visit: www.relate.org.uk