How To Find The Courage To Leave When It’s Over

Finding the courage to leave a bad relationship when it’s truly over is not an easy thing to do. Often, it’s hard to imagine life as a single parent or to face all those financial responsibilities on your own again. But the truth is, if you face the fear and recognise that it’s better to be alone than to wish you were alone, anything is possible.

Here are some top tips on how to leave a partner you love but can no longer live with.

1. When a bad relationship comes to an end, your self-esteem and confidence levels are usually at rock bottom, so facing the fear of going it alone can be paralysing and leave you stranded in misery. You may think you will never love again, that you’ll be alone for the rest of your life or that no one else will want you in the future, but these are fake fears because you lack self-confidence. Remember, there are plenty more fish in the sea.
2. If you’re staying in a bad relationship because you feel guilty, or because you believe you won’t be able to cope financially, don’t let these negative emotions cloud your instincts or judgement. Where there is a will, there is always a way. Making the decision to leave is the first important step, and then having a solid plan in place is the next step.
3. Don’t waste your time or energy worrying what other people will think, or fearing criticism, guilt and shame. These emotions will only keep you chained to a bad relationship. Begin to think about a new you and where this new you could be in a year’s time. If you can build some confidence you’ll find the courage to walk away.
4. Ask yourself what you are getting out of a bad relationship when you know it’s not right for you. Begin to imagine what you could do if you knew you would not fail. Listening to your instincts and gut feeling is a real way to face the truth about how bad things really are.
5. Action is all about doing, so if it’s impossible to imagine packingyour bags and walking away, practice some actions on paper. Write a daily diary about how you feel and a plan of action, once you’ve developed some courage and positive thoughts about being alone again.
6. It’s important to accept your lack of control over other people. The sooner you realise it is impossible to make someone change, the sooner you can learn to let go of someone you love who isn’t right for you.
7. Let go and learn to love again.