We can’t really predict who we are going to fall in love with and there’s no guarantee that when we do, that be tailor-made for us. However, it always helps the long-term prospects of a relationship if one’s potential spouse has certain desirable qualities of an ideal companion. Unfortunately, much of the time we tend to get drawn to people with negative attributes who fit in with our familiar destructive patterns. However, it is possible to break out of this cycle if you make a conscious effort to seek people who have the following qualities.
Emotional maturity: No one is perfect and if you are looking for a perfect partner, you’re likely to be disappointed. However, what you should seek is emotional maturity—the quality that makes a person recognise his own flaws and accept yours as well with an open mind; a person who does not shy away from commitment or the importance of investing emotionally in a relationship.
Honesty: This may sometimes be a bitter pill to swallow, however, the importance of honesty in a relationship cannot be overemphasised. It’s better to deal with a person who tells it like it is even if it unpalatable, instead of one who keeps lying to you. Research has shown that couples who are not honest with each other, not surprisingly, tend to have weaker bonds.
Sensitivity: A person who you are going to be with for the long run should be sensitive to your needs and empathetic to your feelings. You don’t want to spend the rest of your life with a person who doesn’t care about what’s happening in your life or understand what you are going through. This is a rare and precious quality in a person that enriches a relationship.
Affectionate: One reason we get into relationships is because we want someone to cuddle with and hug and kiss without a second thought. Physical affection is extremely important in a relationship and it’s what keeps the flame burning. So look for a partner who is not averse to being touchy-feely and freely showing his or her love.
Respectful: A little bit of respect goes a long way in a relationship. Always choose a partner who respects you as a person; your opinions and your career and is not insecure about you leading your life on your own terms.
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