Adjusting to new living conditions is never easy, especially when you no longer have your own home. Moving your parents to an assisted living center or nursing home is never an easy decision, but there is a third option to consider.
Your parents might not be healthy or mobile enough to care for themselves anymore, but before you move them to a long-term care facility, consider live-in or overnight care. It’s not easy to admit that they are no longer capable of living without assistance, but being allowed to stay in their own home will make the admission easier to make—both for you and for them.
Here are a few ways to help your elderly parents adjust to at-home care.
Involve Them in the Decision
No one wants to feel like their own life is out of their control. When you think your parents are ready for at-home care, approach them with your concerns. Chances are they will recognize that your concerns are valid and agree to give it a try.
However, it can be both humbling and embarrassing to admit that they need help caring for themselves. If your parents reject your suggestion, have an honest conversation with them about why exactly you think they need help and how beneficial a caregiver would be.
Do not go behind your parents’ backs to find them a caregiver unless they no longer have the ability to care for themselves without health or medical risks. In those cases, it is necessary to take matters into your own hands.
Empathize with Their Emotions
Some elderly people will struggle with needing a caregiver more than others. As you discuss living arrangements, empathize with their embarrassment, frustration, and discouragement. Help them see that needing help is nothing to be ashamed of, and that their lives will be more enriched and enjoyable if they have outside help or companionship.
There is no easy way to have this conversation, but listening and responding to their fears and concerns will make all the difference in how smoothly the transition happens.
Find the Right Caregiver
Finding the right caregiver is essential to keeping your parents happy and content with their new living arrangements. Meet with as many companies and professionals as you need to in order to find someone whose personality is compatible with your parents’.
Find someone who has all the right qualifications for your parents’ needs. If they need companionship more than anything else, the care provider might not need to have as many medical qualifications as they would if your parents need help bathing themselves or administering medications.
Most importantly, make sure that your parents like and trust their caregiver. It will be much easier to have someone they love and respect living in their home than someone they feel ambivalent towards.
Establish a Routine
Your parents will still be living in their own home, so at least they will not have to adjust to a new set of rules. But their routines will need to change to some degree to incorporate a third-party into their daily lives.
Whether you choose a 24 hour at-home elderly care provider or an overnight caregiver, you’ll need to help your parents make minor adjustments like having specific bathing times and physical therapy sessions, scheduling consistent times to take medications, and changing their diet if they aren’t already eating the way they should.
If you can establish these new routines a few days before the caregiver arrives, having someone else living in their home might not be as difficult an adjustment.
Be Patient
Give your parents time to get used to their new lifestyle. It might be hard for the first few weeks, but be patient with their requests and complaints. It will take your parents and the caregiver time to become friends—don’t force the process, and don’t give up too quickly if it’s not working.
Adjusting to an in-home care provider won’t be quite as difficult as moving to an assisted living center or nursing home, but it still requires a change of lifestyle and a new “norm.” With the right caregiver and enough love and patience, the transition will go smoothly and successfully for everyone involved.
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