For most of us, the experience of terminal disease is the very definition of uncertainty. It is not something that we were brought up to prepare for, after all. We expected life to flow in a known procession from school to university, career, marriage, kids, grandkids, retirement and death – somewhere far away from us and at a ripe old age. To suddenly discover that things might not take the pattern we expected can leave us feeling like the rug has been pulled out from under us. A cancer diagnosis is a challenge on many levels to both the sufferer and their loved ones. It is a time when they will inevitably reexamine the meaning of life and their expectations. In many cases their emotional wellbeing is in for a serious rollercoaster ride before they can view their experience with a balanced gaze.
The first difficulty for cancer sufferers often has to do with the shock. Things that were important only weeks before cease to be valid, and have to be cancelled immediately. And then, you might find that it is impossible to make plans of any type whatsoever. Holidays, career moves, courses of study – even a night out might no longer present a secure plan for you if you can’t predict how you’ll be feeling. That sense of insecurity can seriously impact your mental wellness. After all, a sense of security is vital to emotional grounding.
Then of course, there is considerable fear about the result of any cancer treatment you might be undergoing. You are about to launch into the biggest battle you will ever face, and don’t know if you’ll come out if it in one piece, if at all. The scary thing about cancer treatment is that you have to get worse before you get better, and the initial side effects of chemotherapy can be devastatingly worrying for some people. The fear of pain, dependence on others, and change of personal identity can be difficult trials to face. Even after the cancer treatment is complete, you know you will have to live out your life with the threat of cancer hanging over you. You will never feel safe from mortality again.
Nobody is strong enough to get through the experience of cancer without falling apart at least once, but the important thing is to recondition how you view the world and the question of your own mortality. We all face the fact of mortality and are doing so all the time – cancer sufferers are simply the people who have to face it sooner. However, they can use the misfortune of their diagnosis as an opportunity to find their peace with the world and the trial of existence at an earlier stage of life. Doing so may very well lead them to have a much better quality of life after their ordeal. It is important for all cancer sufferers to have access to support groups, medical counseling and spiritual guidance of the type they feel close to. As with all trials in life, the experience of human love, community and compassion is vital to a sustained level of wellness.
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