Going through a divorce is an upsetting and traumatic process and when you’re in the middle of a marriage breakup you might vow to stay single forever. But once the dust settles and you get used to life on your own, you might start to think about dating again. If you are contemplating taking a plunge into the dating pool, here are a few useful tips to get started.
Are You Ready? Be honest with yourself – are you really ready to start dating? If you are still experiencing the emotional fallout from a bitter divorce, or your self-confidence has taken a knock, consider whether you might benefit from some more ‘me time’ to regain your emotional equilibrium before dating.
Where to Meet In theory it’s possible to meet Mr or Ms Right anywhere. However, most people find that online dating is the best way to meet potential dates, so sign up for a reputable online dating site and check out who’s available.
What to Wear First impressions count and you’ll be keen to make a special effort to look your best on a first date. Choose an outfit that you feel confident in and most importantly, one that you feel comfortable in. Don’t worry about choosing something overly formal or glamorous – it’s usually best to be smart but fairly casual on a first date. Above all, be yourself and true to your own sense of style.
Stay Safe Always keep personal safety at the forefront of your mind. Although most dates are perfectly safe you still need to be careful.
- Always tell someone where you are going
- Arrange to meet in a busy area such as a bar, rather than at your home or theirs
- Always carry a mobile phone and make sure it’s fully charged
- Always carry money for a taxi home (unless you are driving)
- Always meet in a public place
- Don’t give out your home address until you get to know and trust your date.
Escaping a Dating Disaster Not all dates go as per the plan. Sometimes, no matter how good you are at weeding out the no-hopers, a date can go wrong. You may find you’re bored silly after 20 minutes, or that your date is obnoxious or you have nothing in common, so it pays to have an exit strategy. Arrange for a friend to call you after a set amount of time so you can make your excuses and leave if necessary.
Don’t Take it Personally If you don’t hit it off with your date and the other person doesn’t want to see you again, don’t let that knock your confidence. There could be lots of reasons why they don’t ask for a second date, so don’t blame yourself if things don’t work out. Most people have to go on several dates before they find a perfect match.
Dating after divorce needn’t be traumatic if you enter the game with your eyes wide open and a healthy amount of self-esteem. Treat it as a bit of fun and you never know – you might meet the next love of your life!
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