While the National Vital Statistics System shows a reduction in the number of divorces since 2000, it still occurs at a rate of 6.8 people per thousand. However, not every divorce needs to culminate in a petty, acrimonious court battle. If you want to end your marriage and preserve your friendship with your spouse, there are several actions you can take to ensure your divorce is as friendly as possible.
Hide Nothing from Your Spouse
Not only is hiding assets grounds for continued civil court action, it can easily erode your partner’s trust in you. If hidden assets are discovered, they may begin to wonder what else you are hiding and distrust your word. Whether it’s a huge retirement fund or a piddling savings account of only a few hundred dollars, never try to hide money in a divorce. The same can also be said about goods of value such as antiques, firearms, coin collections and jewels. Talk out a fair division of property instead of attempting to conceal something.
Set Aside Anger and Blame
It doesn’t matter if your spouse cheated or broke promises. What matters is getting the divorce handled fairly so both of you can move on with your lives. Get a firm grip on your emotions and try not to descend into screaming battles or cutting remarks. If you are both committed to an amiable resolution, such emotional outbursts will only serve to undermine your goal.
Get a Good Attorney
For a friendly divorce, it may not be necessary for each spouse to hire a lawyer. If you’d like to use one attorney from Rutter and Sleeth Law Offices or another specialty firm to help you file the paperwork, plenty of states allow one lawyer to represent both people. Find an attorney experienced in divorces to ensure he or she will be familiar with the process and able to answer any questions you may have.
Remember That Children are Not Property
For some couples, the urge to try to ‘split’ the children between them causes a huge rift. While it is certainly possible for two adults to share children and not share a household together, this will require negotiation and fairness. Think about what will be best for the kids and what you can do to make the transition easier. Some couples decide to stay in the same school district so the kids can go back and forth between their parents as they choose. Others may decide on a fair schedule that allows plenty of time with the non-custodial parent on weekends, over the summer and for half the holidays.
An amiable divorce is possible, if you and your spouse are willing to be mature and honest. These tips will help you navigate through your legal separation and emerge with your friendship intact.
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