Research shows that almost two thirds of women experience some form of sexual challenge during their lifetime, whether this is trouble lubricating, difficulty reaching orgasm, pain or discomfort during sex, or a lack or loss of sex drive. Physical changes experienced by women such as childbirth, pregnancy and the menopause can all dampen desire, while factors such as stress, busy lifestyles, and low self-confidence can all have an impact.
Focus on you
For many women, sexual challenges can be overcome by making small mindset changes. Try not to compare yourself to others. Everybody is different and what is right for some women and couples may not be for you. We regularly hear stories of women enjoying their sex lives, but remember that there are no set criteria for what makes a good sex life. Try not to put too much pressure on yourself.
Body image can also hold you back in the bedroom. Understand that your idea of a ‘perfect’ body is not the key to enjoying sex. Remember that nobody is perfect and focus on your good qualities, instead of dwelling on the things you’d rather change.
Get physical
Physical challenges such as a difficulty reaching orgasm, intimate dryness or even fatigue or tiredness can often be overcome naturally through nutrition. Good examples of this are natural supplements that combine the plant-extract pycnogenol with a rose hip extract and naturally occurring amino acids l’arginine and l’citrulline. Together, these nutrients have the ability to improve blood flow and reduce tiredness, increasing desire, pleasure and comfort. Omega-7 enriched sea buckthorn oil from a berry bush can also help with lubrication issues by regenerating the mucous membranes lining the female genital tract. Think about your diet, too. Foods such as oats, leafy green vegetables, oily fish, adding spices like ginger and chilli to dishes and dark chocolate also have libido enhancing qualities. All of these, when eaten regularly, can boost well-being, which, in turn aids desire.
Talk to your partner
It may seem obvious but if you are experiencing any sexual challenges it’s important to remember that you don’t need to overcome them alone. Talk to your partner. They will want to know what excites you. Many couples get drawn into replaying the same formula in the bedroom and this can affect desire. Try to remember the things you tried when you first started having sex and relive those moments. Use your imagination to think of new ways to enjoy yourselves.
If you want to try some new things in bed begin with a positive first. For instance, tell your partner how much you enjoy it when you two do X, Y or Z (whatever little technique you enjoy – maybe your favourite sex position you use regularly). But then carry on with how you’d also like to try A, B or C. This way you can introduce a new technique by first describing one you already enjoy.
Also lead by your behaviour, bring back some of the flirting from your early days. And re-boot the romance between you with loving compliments, little gifts and creating extra time together.
DID YOU KNOW?
There are some foods that boost your sex drive, one of them being black raspberries. This phytochemical-rich food enhances libido. Then there’s watermelon, which contains citrulline amino acid, good for the cardiovascular system and helps relax the blood vessels that increase your sex drive. Peaches pack a ton of vitamin C, which studies show can increase libido in women. It also helps boost blood flow, which means you’ll get turned on even faster.
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