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UK-based sexologist and president of World Association for Sexual Health, Dr Kevan Wylie, is currently in Navi Mumbai to attend the National Conference on Sexology from August 22 to 24. The Council of Sex Education and Parenthood International has organized the event. The 52-year-old sex expert from Sheffield spoke to TOI on sexuality and related issues.
Q. In today’s information age, a lot of data on sex is easily available. At the same time, a lot of it is misleading. Your comment.
A. Yes, the new age has brought out several aspects of sex. What was earlier thought of as taboo or perverse is, sometimes, not considered so now. Normality of sexuality and sexual activities is much wider today. Earlier, we only perceived what we saw in our lives as normal. That is not the case anymore.
Q. Globally, several studies have been done on how work stress affects sexual performance. Do you get many such patients?
A. Of course, that it true. More and more people are spending more of their time working. With hi-tech tools and gadgets, people are also taking work home. This affects sex lives. I always advise people to completely cut off from office, at least when they are in bed with their partners, or there are bound to be problems.
Q. The topic of ‘size matters’ has been an issue of concern among adults. Apparently, pornography has also added fuel to this rather sizeable subject.
A. Size in fact does matter, but mainly among males. I have generally not seen women talk so much about the male manhood. For women, it is basically the technique and emotional bonding that matter, not size.
Q. There is an ongoing debate on whether pornography has given rise to more sexual crimes against women and children.
A. Sex crimes have been taking place even before the advent of pornography on the net. Let us not demonize porn, since not all those who watch graphic content on the web become sexual predators or criminals. However, forcible exploitation of women to make porn films is also wrong and criminal. A right balance has to be achieved.
Q. In India, there is one group opposed to sex education for kids, and there is another which is for it. What is the right approach?
A. Sex education should be ideally imparted to children when they are aged nine and ten. If parents or schools fight shy of doing so, there are several good education portals and sex books that can be given to kids to learn more about it. I feel it is wrong to say that kids will experiment with sex if they are given sex education. On the contrary, they become more responsible.
Q. In many countries, ruling regimes suppress sexuality. Your thoughts on it.
A. Sex should never be suppressed or regulated. Human beings will always be curious about sex and sexuality. It will be better if governments concentrate on the sexual health of people.
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