Maintaining a happy and healthy sex life requires care and attention, much like any other aspect of your lifestyle. The intimacy and excitement of your sex life in the early days of a relationship make sex fun and enjoyable, but often these elements can fade over time – the introduction of careers and children into your life mean that sex isn’t a priority anymore, and it becomes neglected. This doesn’t mean that it needs to stay this way though. With some changes, you can put the spark back into your sex life and make it exciting again.
Talk to your partner – communication is key. You no doubt discuss other areas of your life with your partner, such as work or your children, and your sex life is no less important. If you find it difficult to bring up the subject, try talking about how you feel instead to get the conversation rolling. It’s vital that you reassure your partner that you enjoy being close to them, as discussing sex can sometimes bring up unexpressed feelings which may come across badly if they’re seemingly out of the blue. If you’re finding it hard to talk, try taking a break from the conversation so that you have chance to think, then come back to it later.
For most people, an orgasm is the goal of sex, but this doesn’t need to be the case. Sex is far more than just penetration, and you may find that increasing the intimacy between you and your partner can do wonders for your sex life. Try exploring each other’s bodies, find out what each of you enjoys and spend more time simply being together rather than focusing on penetration – masturbation and oral sex are other great ways to enjoy sex.
If you’ve been with your partner a long time, you’ll probably feel as though you know all there is to know about their body. But you can always find out more and experimenting with your partner can be a fun and erotic way to put the spark back into sex, for both of you. Sexual preferences are unique to everyone, so explore what you may not know about your own body and then share it with your partner.
You may find that you and your partner want varying amounts of sex, but this doesn’t need to be a hindrance. If you don’t want sex as much, most people find that they are happy to provide sexual pleasure to their partner without having to engage in full sexual activity, so this could be something that you could experiment with. Whichever way you decide to mix things up in the bedroom, you could find that your relationship and closeness could benefit greatly.
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