Pain during sex or dyspareunia is estimated to affect the wellbeing of one in five women at some point in their lives, and it can take its toll on your relationship wellness. More often than not, this sexual health issue goes undiscussed and swept under the rug, but there are things you can do to enjoy a healthy sex life again.
Dyspareunia is not a disease, but rather a symptom of a core physical or psychological condition. Age, childbirth or disuse may have caused your vaginal muscles to tighten, or if you’re not using enough lubrication during sex this may cause painful friction. It may be that the way you’re positioned is causing you pain, as your partner’s penis is pushing against certain nerves, or there may have been shift in your muscular or bone formation, which causes pain on contact. Stress or psychological factors could also be at play in your dyspareunia.
Symptoms of dyspareunia can include pain at entry, pain with any penetration (including a tampon), sudden pain after intercourse, deep pain during thrusting, burning pain and aching pain. The goal of treatment for this condition is to reduce these symptoms, which methods such as vaginal dilators, hormone therapy, topical creams or gels (to increase lubrication), Viagra, a vibrator or a suction/pump (to increase your blood flow), stretching exercises, physical therapy (to strengthen supporting muscles and alleviate muscle pressure) and exploring psychological factors that may be contributing.
If you have pain during sex, the first thing you need to do is talk to your partner. Otherwise, this can lead to problems outside of the bedroom, and it’s important for both of you to communicate; you need know that you’re not alone in this, and your partner needs to know that he’s not doing anything wrong. Next, you need to see a doctor in order to identify the source and location of the pain, so that you can get the right treatment. On the rare occasion your doctor isn’t able to help, there are medical practitioners who specialise in female sexual dysfunction. The important thing to remember is to talk about your problem, and never give up.
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