Once upon a time, friends and associates greeted one another with a simple ‘Hello’, a handshake or bow, depending on their culture. But, at some point, social niceties have become more relaxed and today many people greet others with a hug. This is fine if it’s a close family member or long-term friend. But for some, it can feel that the trend for hugging has spun out of control with everyone from your boss and co-workers to random strangers in the street wanting to greet you with a hug. So what do you do if you’re not the hugging type? How do you decline a hug without causing offence?
Well, the first thing to remember is there’s nothing wrong with not wanting to hug. You shouldn’t feel guilty or be labelled unfeeling if you prefer not to hug. The trick to avoiding an incoming hug is to get in with a handshake or simple wave first.
If a hugger is launching themselves at you, take a step back and simply explain, “I’m not a hugger.” Accompany this with a big smile and the other person will find it hard to take offence. Even the most enthusiastic hugger knows that many people don’t feel the same way and so it’s unlikely that you will upset anyone by refusing a hug – as long as you’re friendly and polite.
Of course, if you encounter an over-enthusiastic hugger who you feel will insist on a hug no matter what, it might be time to fake a coughing fit at the crucial moment. They’ll then be likely to move away with no more than a wave.
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