On a first date, you weigh up the prospects of the guy sitting opposite you: Is he going to be good for your emotional wellbeing? Does he have long-term potential? However, while you may have a good eye for figuring out his relationship wellness over dinner, it’s harder to determine how he’ll fare in the bedroom just by the way he chews his pasta – or is it? According to sexpert Tracey Cox, author of Dare: What Happens When Fantasies Come True, a little attention to detail is all it takes to work out your prospective partner’s sexual health.
1. Talk – How he talks is a good indication of how he does…other things, says Tracey. ‘If they talk in a monotone and change facial expressions once an hour, they’re flat-lining. Low enthusiasm means they’ll be boring in bed as well,’ Tracey explains. ‘The person who throws their arms in the air at dinner, nearly knocking over the waiter, is full of life and passion. If they can get that worked up out of the bedroom, just think what they’ll be like in it!’
2. Sit – According to Tracey, ‘Where they choose to sit when you’re out for a drink or dinner is another giveaway. If they choose the seat facing you and the wall instead of the prime people-watching position, you’re onto a winner. The more their focus is entirely on you, the more they can remain in the moment when you’re alone.’
3. Eat – Firstly, what does he choose? Tracey notes, ‘if they’re not into experimenting or trying exotic fare, they’re hardly going to dish up the Kama Sutra behind closed doors.’ Also, make sure he tucks in! ‘Quite frankly, I’d put my money on the guy with love handles who tucks in with gusto, over the one with the six-pack who eats one steamed chicken breast every fortnight,’ Tracey asserts. ‘A good appetite usually means they’ve got a lusty libido to match.’
4. Touch – How does he hold your hand? Tracey comments, ‘Intertwined fingers mean they’re likely to be highly erotic: they’re touching every part of your hand which expresses a desire to be connected physically and emotionally.’ But watch out for the less exciting hand-cupping action! ‘The standard palm-to-palm clasp suggests affection and acceptance though it’s unlikely they’re going to surprise you sexually.’
5. Kiss – You may have worked this one out for yourself, but his kiss is a great indication of his style and skill in the bedroom. ‘Men who cup your face in their hands are romantic souls and usually intense, passionate lovers who want full, reciprocal focus,’ says Tracey. ‘Getting a little carried away during your first kiss is a good sign; if there’s a little groan or moan even better – who wants a lukewarm lover?’
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