What to do When You’re Not in the Mood for Sex

Sex is an important part of any relationship and when one of you isn’t really feeling in the mood, it can put stress on your love life. It’s easy to fall into the trap of running out of time to have sex, from those work emails you have to respond to, to putting the laundry away and doing the washing up – life can get on top of you and before you know it, it’s been ages since you had sex. But once you put the to-do list as a higher priority than your romance, it can spell disaster for other areas of your relationship too. There are ways out of this predicament though. The first way to do this is to embrace the concept of the quickie. Sex doesn’t have to be a marathon session every time in order to be enjoyable, so why not sneak in a quick sex session before work or on your lunch break? It will keep the passion alive and enable you to keep the romance in your relationship. Try keeping the attention on your partner instead of your mundane schedule – leave sexy notes for your partner, surprise them with sex when they’re least expecting it or doing a sexy striptease for your partner. Whatever it is, keep it sexy and romantic.

 

Stress can be a big killjoy in a partnership anyway, but it can certainly spell the death of sex and romance. You’re not going to want to leap into bed the moment you get back from a stressful day at work, but give yourself chance to unwind and the concept of sex may not seem quite so bad. Spend some time with your partner and relax, before seeing where things go – if they lead to sex, great! If not, you’re at least relaxing and enjoying each others company, which is still important in keeping the romantic spark alive. Likewise, if there is stress in your relationship such as with an unresolved argument it can cause problems between you. Don’t allow your feelings to linger for days on end – talk it out with your partner, get to the bottom of what is troubling you both then move forward. Once you get back to that positive and romantic place in your relationship, you can begin to include sex as part of your weekly routine once again. It’s easy to let arguments take centre stage in your relationship, but they don’t need to. Communication really is key in these situations and once you can create an open and honest dialogue in your union, you will find that the arguments are few and far between.

Being tired is a common excuse for people not wanting to have sex but long hours at the office don’t have to mean the end of your sex life. Yes, you may want to lounge on the sofa when you get back from work, but making the effort a few times a week to spend time with your partner and ignite a little romance will have enormous payback in the form of a happy relationship and a healthy sex life. Make a deal with your partner that neither one of you attempts to initiate sex when the other is particularly stressed or tired from work – this means that on days when you’re really wiped out from work, you don’t have to worry about having an awkward exchange of views when you get back. But don’t let intimacy fall to the side either – perhaps replace sex on these occasions with a romantic night in with a nice meal.

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