Fantastic, movie-like sexual experiences tend not to happen in everyday life – in fact, everyday life tends to get in the way of such romance and passion. It’s no-ones fault, but rather part of reality that time runs out and so does our desire to spend hours on romantic gestures and foreplay. You may find yourself questioning, at some point or another, ‘Is this all there is?’. The answer, of course, is no, or at least not all of the time. There is some middle ground between breath-taking sex and no sex at all – it’s just a case of finding it and improving on what you have already. Forget what the movies tell you; good sex requires some work and effort, not just on your partners part but yours as well. You need to take charge of your sex life if you’re not seeing the results you want. The first rule, if you’re single, is that you need to leave your home and meet people.
Great sex, and even great relationships, don’t happen overnight and they don’t happen while you’re spending all of your time indoors. It can be anything from forming a book club to taking up swimming or learning another language. You don’t need to spend every Saturday night dolled up in order to meet the love of your life – simply living your life is often the best way to find that special someone. But that doesn’t necessarily equate to a great sex life and that’s where taking control of your life comes into play. Making time is the first thing you need to do.
There are loads of articles and DVDs on the market targeting this very issue which can help you begin learning exactly what feels good. Do you prefer direct pleasure, hours or foreplay or a combination of the two? If you don’t know, find out! You need to know your body before you can even begin to expect someone else to know what to do in order to please you. Knowledge, it seems, is the easiest way to improve your sex life. You can do this with your partner or on your own. But if the concept of self-investigation makes you feel awkward, take it slow – do some research, set some time aside for just yourself and get to know yourself a little better. You may find reading up on the subject really helpful to give you ideas of ways to improve your sexual knowledge – there are plenty of books on the matter which have proven to be very popular and helpful. And sex toys can be really beneficial in helping you work out what you enjoy and what you don’t.
It could well be the best thing you’ve ever done for yourself. Learning to climax on your own is the first step towards having a fantastic sex life with your partner. But lust is, after all, essential to a good sex life, so don’t be afraid of slipping into a fantasy and enjoying yourself for a while. Go out, meet likeminded people and have some fun. Alternatively, if you’ve already found them, spend some time together getting to know each other again. Often, in relationships, we get trapped into a routine and it can remove all traces of romance and passion. So don’t be shy in sparking that passion again and taking time out of your day for each other to improve on the sex life you already have.
Comments are closed.