Man, don’t you wish you were more confident? Confidence is so important to your overall wellbeing, if only because it helps you strut around the gym with your head held high – even if all you’ve managed is a three-minute jog on the treadmill. According to personal trainer and wellness writer Carly Pizzani, author of the fitness blog Fine Fit Day, ‘As a personal trainer, I’ve seen firsthand the importance of confidence when it comes to achieving results from working out. The gym or any kind of new fitness endeavour can be terribly nerve-wracking for many people, and the catch-22 is that having confidence can help you succeed at your fitness goals.’ So we got five readers to give their best advice on how to be confident in life and in the gym.
1. Everyone Else Feels the Same as You: ‘I do consider myself confident now,’ says Kim. ‘That wasn’t always the case. As I’ve gotten older I’ve realised that people aren’t even thinking about what I say, or wear, or do, and that has made me far more confident.’ Pizzani points out, ‘Remember the old advice for public speaking or interviews, where you were supposed to imagine everyone else was in their underwear? Well, this is a similar concept. Next time you’re feeling nervous or unsure of yourself, recognize that everyone around you is so busy feeling the same way about themselves, they don’t have time to notice what you’re doing or wearing. It can be really liberating to realize that most of the time when you’re working out, no one is paying attention. Bask in that anonymity and enjoy your workout!’
2. It’s All About Body Language:Shannon recalls, ‘My dad taught me that if you say it like you mean it, then people will believe you. I have found that this works on myself. Stand up straight, look people in the eye, and speak clearly. It’s amazing how it can help you to feel more confident. Let your posture lead the way.’ Pizzani explains, ‘Posture can have a huge impact on whether you’re perceived as confident, and when people think you’re confident, it reinforces that idea of yourself in your mind. It’s a bit like forcing yourself to smile when you feel down – sooner or later the feeling you’re trying to “fake” becomes the way you really feel. Next time you’re trying something new, like a spin class or free weights, act confident and don’t be afraid to speak up and ask for help!’
3. Prepare to Fail: ‘I act confident outwardly and expect rejection and failure,’ Emily details. ‘I don’t see this as pessimism, rather that I’m prepared for things not to work out, so I’m comfortable with an enormous amount of professional risk taking. With making attempts comes some inevitable successes – some of which I never would have thought would be a success! This has translated to my approach to fitness, that I should never be afraid to fail, because it’s the process that matters more than the outcome.’ Pizzani adds, ‘You really don’t know what you’re capable of until you try. I have a friend who took a yoga class on a whim, expecting to be horribly inflexible and out of her element. To her surprise, she picked it up really quickly. Four years later and she’s a certified yoga instructor. Even if you believe you’re not going to be able to do a certain kind of workout, attempt it anyway! You never know where your hidden skills may lie.’
4. Don’t Expect Perfection: Alicia asserts, ‘Confidence has a lot to do with distancing myself from ideas of perfection. It’s infinitely harder to feel good about who you are today (which confidence requires) when you’re beating yourself up over your flaws, imperfections, and unmet goals.’ Pizzani affirms, ‘You don’t have to be perfect at everything. Even when you’re working hard at something, even when you’re good at something, you’re always going to have “off” days, and that’s okay. As a runner, I’m used to having a race where I do amazingly well followed by one where I feel awful and have a really poor result. That’s okay – it’s part of life.’
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